Apple orchard and pumpkin patch!!

As I have expressed many times before I LOVE fall!! It is my favorite time:). Even though it can be a kind of kiddish thing I love going to the apple orchard and pumpkin patch. I had the best day last Saturday! I got to start it going the Dolls to watch the kids and have donuts with them:). Then I went to the apple orchard with 7 other girls! Even though some of them got a little cranky and were complaining about the heat, I still had fun!! It just reminded me that especially in big groups everybody won't always be happy. Be happy! Be positive! It is still easy to have fun if you are loving Jesus in your heart and not letting others negativity get you down! Here are some pictures from the afternoon:). 

We got very lost in the pumpkin patch:(. It was scary! I am good with directions and I felt the most lost ever. 

And finally I ended the day hanging out with my youth leader at church and Rachel another girl that goes to Valley! We made cookies and delivered them to neighbors as well as praying for them! I had such a wonderful day!! 

Have faith, not fear

Today on Pinterest I saw this beautiful picture. As I have expressed in my other blog I love fall.  I love every single thing about it. When I go to work out at night and walk outside afterwards listening to awesome Jesus music and feel the beautiful weather I just want to drop to my knees and praise God. This weather just causes me to feel something amazing. I feel closer to God. I can sense Him in every single way and just sing out to Him! Believe that God is real and that He is powerful. He can do amazing things. That is why every day when I start to have anxiety about AP physics or college or homecoming or anything, I can sigh and just say God Almigjty you are in control!! He is there, I know it and I believe it every day. I want to live out that belief and tell others about the amazing news! I have nothing to be afraid of. Even if all my relationships aren't the exact way I desire them to be, God is sovereign and He is in control. I have no fears or worries because it is all part of His perfect plan! If He has for me to be or not be friends with someone that is up to Him and not me! I am thrilled for a free night tonight to get to relax and spend time in the Word doing my own bible study and digging deeper! My friends, He is there and He knows what He is doing! We shall not doubt! I love where God has me right now!!! It's soooo awesome! Praise you Lord! 

Love at all times

Let's face it, humans all sin and are all going through their own stuff. Everyone is going through something good or bad. And we are also facing tough things. To others it may not seem like a big deal to others but if it is to us, it is to God. God cares about what we are feeling. He is there for us in a mourning and our stress. And even though this issue may seem like the end of the world it is not. 

My point is not that this world sucks and that there are so many problems but that we don't know what others are going through and they don't know what we are going through. Love them. Love yourself. Always maintain a state of love in your heart. Love is so important and love is what we can do to reflect Christ. Be love and show love! That is all I can say!! Do all you can and that you are capable of to love those people in your family and the ones you only see once a month! Care for them and express to them how much they mean to you. I am all about hugs, and to me when I am with others that I really love a lot I just want to hug them lots! That is how I show what they mean to me. Find your way you show love and do it! Every day to everyone you see! If it means smiling then smile all day long! Loving God allows you to love others so put Him first. Spend time being loved by Him so you can more it into others. But LOVE. 

Jesus loves me

Today at underground at Valley church we had a really cool speaker, Greg Speck. He is an awesome guy and just fun to be around! He talked to us about our journey especially as high school students. He asked us 2 questions...does Jesus love you more if you do a 30 day devotional? No. Does Jesus love you less if you don't do a 30 day devotional? No. Well, wait what, ummmm, I'm confused. What's be point then?!?! He loves us the same either way so we can do whatever we want! We can party and drink and not spend time in the word and He still loves us, YAY!!! Nope. But if I spend all my time with God and no time on homework or sports or having fun and just reading the bible He still loves me the same. Grrrr. I'm lost. Nope nope is the answer. We don't do things so God will love us more but we do them so that we can love Him more. God is not the one who needs help loving people or forgiving, it is us. We can always know more about Him. Being a christian is not boring. One day we can talk a walk and praise God for nature, then do some random acts of kindness, then we can read through a couple chapters of John, then we can spend time with our family. Every day I realize how many huge oppurtunities I have as a christian!! It is sooooo exciting!!! God gives us so many wonderful things to do! 

People always say Christianity is a sprint and not a marathon. What does that actually mean? Well if someone has everyone line up on a line and tells them to run 100 yards, I think everyone could do it. Some people might take a couple of minutes others no time at all. But the point is everyone would be able to accomplish it. It is fairly easy. But a marathon is over 26 miles with no stopping. What sane person does that?!?! If everyone starts on the same line I think a lot of people would just fall down from the start because they know they can't finish or they don't want to try and others will try and slowly stagger off giving up. Very few would make it to the finish line, especially if there was no preparation. That is Christianity for you. It scares many people. They think it will be too much work. They don't think they are good enough for the race or able to finish. Well christians are not perfect the only way we complete the marathon is by the grace of God. We get exhausted and want to give up but we persist through. Some will try and decide it's not for them or that God isn't faithful enough and bad things happen. But the battle is within it is not a battle between God and satan. The battle is between what power we choose. Keep running no matter how exhausted you are. The marathon does not stop once you have kids or you get older it is till the day we go see Jesus!! 

Remember being a christian and a disciple is not about what we did but what we are doing. It is -ing verbs not past tense. I am reading the word daily. I am going to church. I am sharing the good news of the gospel. I am fasting. We are not done and we are no where near complete. Stay on Gods path for you. 

The center

I think so many times I hear people saying "what's the point?" And the truth is sometimes in the activities we choose as humans there isn't a point. But when we put Jesus Christ at the center of all of our activities and problems and work and everything else there is a point. We are doing it for Jesus. 

At the beginning of this blog I was super excited and would consistently post or blog everyday. Well that newness wears off. I get busier everyday with school and work and different volunteer things and church. Last May I actually stopped writing for a good deal of time because I couldn't find a point in it. I felt like nobody was reading and like me writing was causing more stress than good. For me there had to be a point, and there wasn't. I wanted so many people to be reading it. Then talking to a friend I realized that the blog was not necessarily for everyone else but for me and Jesus. It should be a source of strength and encouragement for my relationship with Him. I am not writing for others or to have this huge blog that everyone reads. If people read it  that is great! But my ultimate goal is just write down my thoughts about Jesus and my love for Him and I can see personal growth too. 

Sharing that story is to express that sometimes there may not be a point or you are trying to do something for Jesus and getting to stressed. That is not good. God does not want to pile and pile "things for us to do" on us and cause us a ton of stress. He wants us to be productive and loving servants. If you are doing a service project but getting mad at others or not loving them, you have the wrong heart. Don't just stop doing everything and give up. Examine your heart. At the heart of your job is it you loving Jesus? Working with kids especially can be exhausting and hard and frustrating at times. But sometimes if I am getting overwhelmed all I have to do is just smile and say I love you God, this is what you gave me and have for me. What is at the center of your universe? If it is not Jesus, then you might need to pray and ask God for guidance. Christians again and again I have seen get to overwhelmed. This is not what God desires. Do what He has for you. Don't just try to be busy. And do what you do with ALL your heart!! Working for The Lord not for men. Make Jesus your center. Knowing at the end of the day He is holding you in His arms and you get to talk to Him every night! Jesus is my all in all! 

King and country

This is one of my favorite christian bands right now! They have awesome songs- fix my eyes and the proff of your love. Their new album just came out today and I love it! If you haven't gotten a chance to look at it listen right away!! They are sooooo good!! And the best news is that on November 16th they are coming to valley church to perform!! More details are coming soon but I can't wait for a night of worshipping The Lord! I have just been in love with God lately and love getting in the car and just blasting the music to praise my awesome God and Father! Another great song that has been really heavy on my heart is this is amazing grace! Worshipping God and singing praises to Him is one of my favorite things to do and I love getting to do it with those I love! God our father I love you and praise you! Take the time in the car to not talk on the phone or be angry with other drivers but just sing at the top of your lungs to God!! 

*Iowan drivers are ranked 15th rudest so instead of focusing on that use driving to focus on God!! 

Happy birthday!!

I love birthdays! The fall is a very busy time with birthdays for me and it can be a bit overwhelming but love getting to bless the people I love and care about them!!! I think birthdays are soooo important to get to love and bless the people you love. Show them how much you care about them and what they mean to you!! It's so important to show how special God made them and how God created them for a special purpose! 

Happy birthday Jenessa!! I love you sooooo very much and I am sooooo soooo very thankful for you!! God has made you so amazingly! And you serve so many awesome purposes! Thank you for all you have done for me and the ways you have blessed me! Jenessa you are awesome in every way! I look up to you sooooo much! Love you!! 

Great verse!

But, “Let the one who boasts boast in the Lord.” For it is not the one who commends himself who is approved, but the one whom the Lord commends. (2 Corinthians 10:17-18 NIV)

Tomorrow Wednesday the 10th!

I am so excited for tomorrow. I took the day of from work I still have to go in for an hour because of somebody else but I get the rest of the day to myself!! I am so excited to just get to enjoy Gods presence and read His word! I think I might get to go shopping tomorrow from like 3-6 tomorrow maybe too. So call me if you would like to go shopping with me or read the word together! I am excited for a good bible study!! And I get to finish the night tomorrow with youth group at valley from 8:15-9:30! Jesus is going to fill my day tomorrow! Let me know if you would like to get together:). It's such a blessing when God gives me free time!

Who are you in the church?

We started a really amazing series last week at Valley church that resonated with my heart a lot and I wanted to share! The series is called "All through Christ a life changing encounter" which is just so amazing and true! When we encounter Christ it will and does change our lives! 

He gave us a list of people who don't impact the church or change the church. Here it is! 

1. The counter fit-the person who isn't actually changed they are just faking it and going to church not actually letting God change them. 

2. The dried out sponge- they used to be useful but aren't anymore. They aren't passionately seeking God. They are exhausted and the christian life is not for them anymore. 

3. Garbage collector- I love this one. All they do is smell they pick up on the junk and the trash (the gossip and negativity). They collect it and thrive off of it. And when try get together with others they just become a garbage dump. 

4. Sherman tank- the increase tension and make people uncomfortable. A little scary sometimes even. 

5. The wet blanket- always tell you why it won't work and what's wrong with that idea. Nothing is ever good or done. 

6. Bureaucrat- always worried about the policies and getting everything orangized. Not letting the power of God do it. 

7. Thumb sucker- pouts and is moody. They are never happy or get their way. 

8. Chicken little- they are scared and the sky is falling. God doesn't overcome their fears. Never trying anything new. 

9. Invisible man- never goes to anything or is there and not actually there in heart. 

I think this is such an awesome list! You don't want to be these things but you also don't want to be too much of the opposite of them either. Be present in heart and spirit. Loving others. 

There is a really funny video if you go to YouTube and type in dog protecting bone from himself. He is literally attacking himself. We don't want to do that in the church! They are part of the body and we have to protect and love them! 

Visiting my sisters!

We got to go to davenport last weekend where my older sister clarissa goes to school and my other sister Miranda was playing soccer there! It was great to see them! I got so close to Miranda and Clarissa in the last year and I miss then greatly! 

Clarissas roomate crystal:). 

Perfect?

Jesus was and is perfect to this day. He had no faults or sin. He was born of the perfect father. We are sinful people and will always will be. I have sinned, as much as you and I may try and act like the perfect christians sometimes we have sinned. Some sins are worse than others and we are more appalled at things like adultery and murder but why is there a level of sin? Lying is just as much of a sin as murder. It is all sin to God, so why in our culture have we made some sins acceptable and others punishable by death. Lying is punishable by death by going to hell just as much as murder is. Just like God just as easily forgives liars as He does cheaters. We are not better sinners than others we are all sinners. Gossip is sin. God hates sin. Therefore He hates gossip and He does not like people who gossip. Don't think that God has better things to worry about than your gossip because your gossip or lies may be just as bad sin as your world as murder. They may cause murder. 

In my life I am so sick of trying to be the perfect person that has it all together. This last weekend has been one of the saddest and most humbling of my life. I have felt alone, angry, happy, scared, stressed, abandoned, hurt, forgotten, loved all in one weekend. And honestly I just cried. I lost it. I cannot physically or mentally depend on myself. I am sick of being the person that always has her life together-perfect grades, trying to be involved in every activity at school and church and work, always having my nails painted and my legs shaved and having the best outfits. Never letting anything phase me or upset me. Putting the brave face on even when I am badly hurting or upset. Always trying to set the perfect example. No it's done. I am not perfect and won't ever be. I can't ever be that perfect person. By the grace of God I can be who He has me to be. Don't let that stress overtake you and lose the battle. You aren't in control of your life and if God isn't you still aren't, Satan is. Give God the control, pour your struggles on to Him. He can do it all and we can do it all through Him. Don't get to the point where you come to nothing because you are trying to do everything. Cry out to God today!! Ask and beg for love and forgiveness and I know I know He will put it in your heart and give you His heart. He is the Prince. 

Happy birthday Haley!

Thursday was my best friends birthday! She turned 17! I am honored and blessed that I got to spend time with her and love her on birthday! She is such an amazing friend and is always there for me! I praise God for her life and what she has done for me and her faithfulness through all the years. I pray that God has awesome things in store for her in this next year and truly blesses her and that she develops a passionate relationship with Him!!! 

Oreo balls that I made:). 

Haley and I at the Holliwell bridge in winterset! 

All alone?

In less than a month I had all 3 of my sisters move out. Today my final sister left and she is the oldest. She is moving to Chicago and she will most likely never be moving home again. Miranda and Clarissa will be back for breaks and summers still but otherwise it's just me for 2 more years. I am so used to having people around and just always being able to talk to somebody or go do something with one of my sisters. Now they are all gone. All of my neighbors I have been close with have moved away. It seems like it has just been tears after tears and more people leaving. Today I have had a lot of tears. A lot more tears than I expected. One of my sisters is home for the weekend but she leaves tomorrow and is hanging out with friends today. It's just not the same. And to be honest it sucks big time. Things do change and I don't like it. And I have tried to make myself more busy so I don't think about it but then the moment I am not busy all I can do is think about it. The solution is not to sweep it under the wrong. Where does that go? Under the rug until something upsets you again or you are tempted and those things boil up. The is answer is you are never alone God is there for you always. But God isn't standing right in front of me able to hang out with me or physically talk to me or give me hugs. It truly isn't the same and I am not going to act like it is. Cry out to God literally crying and pray as long as it takes. How long most I pray? Can the maker of all the stars hear the sound of my breaking heart? (Hold my heart)! It is such a great song! And the answer is yes He can hear our hearts breaking and He knows the pain. He is waiting for us to call out on His name and He will call on us and love us and He will give us a hug. He will take us into His awesome fatherly arms and love us and protect us from the pain of this world. Last names are just names possibly even temporary names. They will change and go away. But who is your family in the kingdom of God is an eternal thing. They are your family forever and God is your family forever. I pray your family and my family is also part of that eternal family but it is just so important to have an eternal perspective. Don't drown in your misery and pain and don't sweep it under the wrong. If you cry enough and cry out to God realizing how much your deep need for Him is He will hold you. He will hold your heart in His hands and do all He wants to bless you and love you! He wants to love you! No matter how deep the pain is, God is ready to meet you in the exact moment of pain. Take Gods path. No matter how alone I feel there is somebody that is literally ALWAYS listening to my words and my heart and thoughts. He knows me and He loves me and you. We are not alone. I have many brothers and sisters in Christ and the most amazing Heavenly Father!! 

Daniel and the lions den

Again and again in Daniel we see Daniels faithfulness AND trust in God at such a young age. His faith is so inspiring and should be to all. The king trusted and honored him so much but the people did not like him. He had such amazing character and love that I'm sure made the people feel insecure about themselves and like he was a threat to them. But Daniel was just serving God! He loved His God and was faithful to Him. The people just didn't want him around and sometimes our faith in God does scare others and just show them something new and different that they may not like. Did this cause Daniel to change his behavior or faith though? No!! He remained faithful to God and continued praying even after a decree was issued. The king cared deeply about him to and did not want him to die. But following law he had to put Daniel in the lions den. I can just imagine Daniel in there worshipping God and loving those lions. Daniel was not harmed and neither was his faith. But instead the nation of Daniels was trusted to God and told to worship Him and praise Him for He lives forever!! He is always true and always there for us. Let us have faith like Daniel never ceasing and never failing! 

We aren't perfect and others aren't either

I've been thinking a lot lately about well this person did this and that and this. Oh and they did this but he did that and on and on the list goes. Never in our lives will sin not hurt us. We will always get offended by things, hurt by others sin and hurt by our own sin. But we can also sin in not being able to forgive others and also the expectations we hold others to. I run into this a lot especially with people who are not christians. But that is exactly it they aren't christians they don't acknowledge their sin but I do. Christians sometimes can more easily see sin except when it is their own. Christians and non christians sin. Sin hurts us, but imagine how God feels. He is hurt 1000 times more than us. But the difference is God is perfect and He still doesn't expect us to be perfect, He knows we will sin and fall but He forgives. Unlike God we aren't perfect but still do have to be like God in the second part being willing to forgive and accept others sin. And yes sometimes they may not even apologize. It sucks. But there are times we don't apologize either. 

It's funny because I am obsessed with creighton right now. I wear my shirts whenever I can and I talk about it whenever possible in conversation! My sisters will be talking about college and I always relate it to creighton. I always joke with my family that I have to represent:). I don't even go there yet! Same with my school we defeated Valley in football and now everyone is representing and talking good things about our football. Represent. As I don't think being a christian is as much as the outside like wearing creighton t-shirts we can still do that with having Jesus backgrounds, listening to Jesus music in the car, dressing modestly, having a bible app are all good things it truly is what is on the inside. I love creighton! I think about when I will get to go back there, experience more of it, learn more about it and someday go there! I love talking about it and bragging it up to others. I think this is how our relationship should be with Jesus. Even though we aren't in heaven or eternity yet we should still represent. And most people do represent where they plan to spend eternity. I haven't fully experienced creighton yet but I have seen and felt amazing things just like with God we haven't experienced heaven yet but God has allowed us to feel amazing and incredible things and see awesome things! We know God is great and we should be telling others about how awesome our lives can be with Him. But we have to show that with our lives too. FULLY living for God and screaming for Him!! Bring Him up in every conversation! Show the life Jesus lived. Don't be a hypocrite. 

Just because I feel like I shouldn't date in high school does not mean I can get mad at friends for dating or judge them. It never flat out says it is sin. It is all about the heart. Pray for your friends and families hearts. God will heal and change them. Set your expectations appropriately.